OK so like today I'm like on the bus and stuff, and like I'm sitting near two pretty young women who are like sitting in the sideways seats?
Like the seats are sideways? On the bus? Like what's up with that?
What happens if the bus like hits a moose or a bear on the transitway?
Sideways whiplash? Like that would hurt right?
And what about the moose and the bear? What if they have little meese or bear scouts or whatever? They'd be like homeless and then the market would have like more homeless people right? And that would be like so wrong?
And that's why I don't vote - because like things never change and like voting at night is a pain because it always happens like during "So You Think You Can Like Dance" or "America's Next Top Model" or "American Idle" (which is way way better than "Canadian Idle" right?).
Canadian shows sooooo like suck and everything right?
But I digest.
Said wimmin were in their early twenties. I've seen them before; they're the cookie cutter junior civil servant type, fresh out of university after a lifetime of schooling and being told they're special and entitled. They were extremely loud and one of them had a laugh like a pile driver hitting solid metal (and I think we all know what that sounds like).
They spoke about every banal subject under the sun, but mostly about their boyfriends. When they did speak about their jobs (very briefly) it was to complain about not being senior enough and there are too many old people who are telling them what to do. Really.
One particularly brilliant exchange (names have been invented to exaggerate their stupidity):
Faleeshah: So like my boyfriend plays baseball.
Tammee: Yeah, he's sooo hot.
Faleeshah: Back off!!! Hahahahaha!
Tammee: No way! Hahahahaha!
Faleeshah: Anyway, so like they had nobody to do the scoring, you know like the guy who stands behind the batter?
Tammee: Oh like the guy who decides if you're in or out?
Faleeshah: Yeah, the guy. The ref or whatever.
Tammee: Yeah, that's the ref.
Faleeshah: So like my boyfriend's really really good but when it was his turn to hit the ball, he must have been distracted by me. So he kept missing, so I called him out.
Tammee: What?!
Faleeshah: I called him out.
Tammee: No way! Really? Why? What did he do?
Faleeshah: He didn't hit the ball, and the other guy threw it too many times so I had to call him out.
Tammee: But what did you call him out for?
Faleeshah: For missing the ball! You have to like tell the guy, like, "You're out!"
Tammee: Why?
Faleeshah: Oh it's like a rule or something. Then they have to like go sit down and have a beer or whatever.
Tammee: Oh! I thought you were calling him out like because he was unfaithful or dissed you. Hahahahaha!
Faleeshah: Shut up! HahahahahahaHAH!
Tammee: No YOU shut up! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
You just can't make this stuff up.
Sounds like the conversations I used to hear all day in my charming open-concept office booth with the four-foot high dividers.
ReplyDeleteOn a happier note, have you noticed how the buses aren't as full as they were before the strike? No one is saying anything (maybe it's an OC Transpo secret) but ridership seems to be way down. I can, like, sometimes, get a seat now.
Ah young ladies where the depth of their conversation surrounds whats on their back and who has them on their back.
ReplyDeleteYup, yer average Canadian female runs about as deep as a balloon at that age. No wonder they "put off having kids" until they're in their thirties. Shallow as they are, this is a BLESSING.
ReplyDeleteLike, girlfriend, you doan wan yer kids to lern like Inglish from ya until ya can tok it rite and rite it rite yerself, rite? Like it's like the SMART thing ta do is like WATE TIL YER READY, no whud I meen? So I'm gonna wait...
". . . and being told they're special and entitled." Yep. I've worked with many of them. The other thing that always surprises me is that even after 30 years of feminist discourse, no matter how smart and capable they are, the cuter they are, the more they figure they can get away with so the lazier they are. Although anecdotal, I've seen this phenomenon often enough to notice a trend. I guess angry feminist rhetoric still takes a back seat to "the easy way out".
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