"First of all, stay calm," McGuinty said. "There's a real concern here, there's no doubt about that, but it's not a cause for undue alarm."
Well that's good enough for me. If Dalton says something, it has to be true.
29 April 2009
Help Me Dalton!
Not only is the swine flue killing everyone in Ontario, but we read in the news today that our ash trees are infested with a killer bug!
The Emerald Ash Borer is a busy little fellow (and fellette - no offence intended to the feminist beetle community). He/she is busy laying eggs in our ashes, and apparently the larvae are not good for the trees' quality of life; i.e. they die.
According to today's Ottawa Citizen, "There is no known practical way of stopping the bug, and if one isn't found, all ash trees in the city - about 25 per cent of all trees - are expected to die in 10 to 15 years. About 90,000 property owners in the city will be affected. Government officials estimate 30 to 40 per cent of all trees in Eastern Ontario are ash, and will suffer the same fate."
The situation is so bad in the Ottawa/Hull area that a quarantine has been imposed by the Ontario Ministry of Agriculture. Under the Plant Protection Act we can't remove ashes from their habitat for fear of spreading the problem. Basically we can't go dragging our ashes about without begin fined by the ash protection squad. I only hope these lads and laddettes will also stop the beetles from leaving the quarantine area. I'm sure when the little borers see the quarantinos and their barbwire perimeter fences, they'll think twice before leaving their partner beetles and little larvae in search of a new piece of ash.
Wait! I'm told by my sources that there is a remedy! It's called Bayer Advanced Garden Tree and Shrub Insect Control! Hallelujah!
Whew! that was close.
Wait! I'm told by my sources that Mother Dalton banned all insecticides on Earth Day last week.
Oh well, as any Canadian will tell ya when faced with a situation he/she finds boring, "What can you do?"
Indeed. It's only 30-40 per cent of the trees in the province that are in danger. It's not as if it's 100 per cent! And losing all those trees is actually a small price to pay, if it means Dalton McGuinty remains steadfast and true as he leads his P.O.O.s (Peasants Of Ontario) into the treeless, plantless, and lawnless 21st Century.
The Emerald Ash Borer is a busy little fellow (and fellette - no offence intended to the feminist beetle community). He/she is busy laying eggs in our ashes, and apparently the larvae are not good for the trees' quality of life; i.e. they die.
According to today's Ottawa Citizen, "There is no known practical way of stopping the bug, and if one isn't found, all ash trees in the city - about 25 per cent of all trees - are expected to die in 10 to 15 years. About 90,000 property owners in the city will be affected. Government officials estimate 30 to 40 per cent of all trees in Eastern Ontario are ash, and will suffer the same fate."
The situation is so bad in the Ottawa/Hull area that a quarantine has been imposed by the Ontario Ministry of Agriculture. Under the Plant Protection Act we can't remove ashes from their habitat for fear of spreading the problem. Basically we can't go dragging our ashes about without begin fined by the ash protection squad. I only hope these lads and laddettes will also stop the beetles from leaving the quarantine area. I'm sure when the little borers see the quarantinos and their barbwire perimeter fences, they'll think twice before leaving their partner beetles and little larvae in search of a new piece of ash.
Wait! I'm told by my sources that there is a remedy! It's called Bayer Advanced Garden Tree and Shrub Insect Control! Hallelujah!
Whew! that was close.
Wait! I'm told by my sources that Mother Dalton banned all insecticides on Earth Day last week.
Oh well, as any Canadian will tell ya when faced with a situation he/she finds boring, "What can you do?"
Indeed. It's only 30-40 per cent of the trees in the province that are in danger. It's not as if it's 100 per cent! And losing all those trees is actually a small price to pay, if it means Dalton McGuinty remains steadfast and true as he leads his P.O.O.s (Peasants Of Ontario) into the treeless, plantless, and lawnless 21st Century.
23 April 2009
Don't Try to Immigrate to Canada if You're an Obese PLANET KILLER!
Who woulda thunk it? Not only are obese people more responsible than the svelte for KILLING THE PLANET, they will be doubly responsible if they the decide to take up residence in Canada.
A luminary from the Population Institute of Canada tells the Ottawa Citizen today that overweight immigrants will bring nothing with them but a heavy (hee hee) burden on the planet, thanks to the extra greenhouse gases they are responsible for producing.
I'm trying to think of something funny to say, but there's no need. This is hilarious stuff. Too bad so many Canadian sheep buy into this nonsense.
Happy St. George's Day! (He was no fatty.)
A luminary from the Population Institute of Canada tells the Ottawa Citizen today that overweight immigrants will bring nothing with them but a heavy (hee hee) burden on the planet, thanks to the extra greenhouse gases they are responsible for producing.
I'm trying to think of something funny to say, but there's no need. This is hilarious stuff. Too bad so many Canadian sheep buy into this nonsense.
Happy St. George's Day! (He was no fatty.)
22 April 2009
Calling all members of Mountain Equipment Co-op!
What a week of achievement, and it's still only Hump Day!
This week the Swiss hosted the Durban 2 Jew Bashing Festival, Hitler and Lenin celebrated their birthdays, and fat people were told they were destroying the planet. And today we saw the usual gang of humourless limousine liberals beating their sculpted chests over Earth Day (Happy B-Day Vladimir!) and reminding their anxiety-laden schoolchildren to save the planet now or they'll all die.
To add to this week of noble pursuits and causes, it would seem that Mountain Equipment Co-op could be changing its business model. The purveyor of outdoorsy gear and garb is about to vote on taking a principled stand outside its purview of selling overpriced crap to unsuspecting snobs.
"How Happy? How? What principled stand might this be?", one might ask.
Well, one might answer that MEC, in all its wisdom, will "weigh in on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. A motion is expected to be presented next week at the retailer's annual general meeting in Vancouver, calling for a boycott of all products produced in Israel."
"We just don't think (Mountain Equipment Co-op) should be doing business with Israel until it changes its behaviour," said a well-educated BC teacher - ahem.
Now perhaps this vote may not go through, maybe it's all a tempest in a teapot and might be killed by common sense, but we can't sit by and let this happen. We must inform MEC that this is a disgusting and yes - un Canadian - stunt, especially from a business that claims to take the ethical high road in retail (if that means anything).
So please - help stop MEC now! Threaten to expose their loathsome behaviour and if you're a member, cancel your membership and spread the word to decent Canadians.
Start with the Ottawa branch!
This week the Swiss hosted the Durban 2 Jew Bashing Festival, Hitler and Lenin celebrated their birthdays, and fat people were told they were destroying the planet. And today we saw the usual gang of humourless limousine liberals beating their sculpted chests over Earth Day (Happy B-Day Vladimir!) and reminding their anxiety-laden schoolchildren to save the planet now or they'll all die.
To add to this week of noble pursuits and causes, it would seem that Mountain Equipment Co-op could be changing its business model. The purveyor of outdoorsy gear and garb is about to vote on taking a principled stand outside its purview of selling overpriced crap to unsuspecting snobs.
"How Happy? How? What principled stand might this be?", one might ask.
Well, one might answer that MEC, in all its wisdom, will "weigh in on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. A motion is expected to be presented next week at the retailer's annual general meeting in Vancouver, calling for a boycott of all products produced in Israel."
"We just don't think (Mountain Equipment Co-op) should be doing business with Israel until it changes its behaviour," said a well-educated BC teacher - ahem.
Now perhaps this vote may not go through, maybe it's all a tempest in a teapot and might be killed by common sense, but we can't sit by and let this happen. We must inform MEC that this is a disgusting and yes - un Canadian - stunt, especially from a business that claims to take the ethical high road in retail (if that means anything).
So please - help stop MEC now! Threaten to expose their loathsome behaviour and if you're a member, cancel your membership and spread the word to decent Canadians.
Start with the Ottawa branch!
21 April 2009
What does a group of Tamil protesters and Dalton McGuinty have in common?
NOTHING:
One is up front and honest about what it believes, whereas Dalton McGuinty is a disingenuous politician, who lies about tax increases and distracts the P.O.O. (Peasants Of Ontario) from important issues that he has no intention of dealing with in his lifetime (health care, the economy and education are just three little things that come to mind). Aside from raising taxes, Dalton's one "talent" is his obsession with bans - on things and certain types of behaviour - that he finds distasteful. (Of course, he'll tell us, in his trademark condescending way, that these control measures are all for the benefit of his P.O.O.)
This popped into my feeble little brain as I strode purposefully (and with alacrity, not to mention élan) down Wellington and Queen Streets this afternoon, surrounded by what seemed to be thousands of Tamil protesters returning to their homes and/or buses after their day on Parliament Hill.
I've been ranting to my friend about the way these protests have inconvenienced those who are trying to get around the downtown core; however, I will admit that the majority of protesters have been peaceful and respectful (if a little loud). Today there was a kind of carnival atmosphere as many were happily milling about, some in groups, others with their families, and most carrying Canadian flags. Now carrying a Canadian flag doesn't mean you're a great Canadian, and I haven't been in total agreement with what they've been doing; but they are not what I'd call an unruly mob of ne'er-do-wells looking for trouble. (Unlike, say, um, left wing - and usually white - "anarchists" who get violent at G20 summits, then when they're tired go home to rich mummy and daddy's for a nice cuppa.... But I digest.)
So I go home, kiss the life partner (with alacrity I must say), and turn on CJOH News at 6 for my dose of Max Keeping and the lady who seems embarrassed all the time. And there's the reminder that the ban on pesticides is fast approaching. So my thoughts turn once again to our loving Mother McGuinty.
"Our generation has taken to the cosmetic use of pesticide and I think that perhaps unwittingly, not realizing the dangers it represents to ourselves and most importantly to our children," our Benevolent Leader said. He makes these pronouncements in that annoying way that reminds his P.O.O. that he is the only good parent in Ontario, or possibly in all of Canada, or even the Planet (which he will show us how to save BTW). As Marni Soupcoff points out, cosmetic pesticides are approved for use by none other than Health Canada. Booze, ciggies and sleeping pills are worse for "our kids". So facts be damned. Just keep the P.O.O. on their toes!
So here is a plea to our Tamil-Canadian protesters. Please stay in Ottawa and switch the focus of your protests to include all things banned by Mother Dalton the Compassionate. I'll join you and march with pride (and alacrity), on the pesticide-free and grub-laden lawn of Parliament Hill.
One is up front and honest about what it believes, whereas Dalton McGuinty is a disingenuous politician, who lies about tax increases and distracts the P.O.O. (Peasants Of Ontario) from important issues that he has no intention of dealing with in his lifetime (health care, the economy and education are just three little things that come to mind). Aside from raising taxes, Dalton's one "talent" is his obsession with bans - on things and certain types of behaviour - that he finds distasteful. (Of course, he'll tell us, in his trademark condescending way, that these control measures are all for the benefit of his P.O.O.)
This popped into my feeble little brain as I strode purposefully (and with alacrity, not to mention élan) down Wellington and Queen Streets this afternoon, surrounded by what seemed to be thousands of Tamil protesters returning to their homes and/or buses after their day on Parliament Hill.
I've been ranting to my friend about the way these protests have inconvenienced those who are trying to get around the downtown core; however, I will admit that the majority of protesters have been peaceful and respectful (if a little loud). Today there was a kind of carnival atmosphere as many were happily milling about, some in groups, others with their families, and most carrying Canadian flags. Now carrying a Canadian flag doesn't mean you're a great Canadian, and I haven't been in total agreement with what they've been doing; but they are not what I'd call an unruly mob of ne'er-do-wells looking for trouble. (Unlike, say, um, left wing - and usually white - "anarchists" who get violent at G20 summits, then when they're tired go home to rich mummy and daddy's for a nice cuppa.... But I digest.)
So I go home, kiss the life partner (with alacrity I must say), and turn on CJOH News at 6 for my dose of Max Keeping and the lady who seems embarrassed all the time. And there's the reminder that the ban on pesticides is fast approaching. So my thoughts turn once again to our loving Mother McGuinty.
"Our generation has taken to the cosmetic use of pesticide and I think that perhaps unwittingly, not realizing the dangers it represents to ourselves and most importantly to our children," our Benevolent Leader said. He makes these pronouncements in that annoying way that reminds his P.O.O. that he is the only good parent in Ontario, or possibly in all of Canada, or even the Planet (which he will show us how to save BTW). As Marni Soupcoff points out, cosmetic pesticides are approved for use by none other than Health Canada. Booze, ciggies and sleeping pills are worse for "our kids". So facts be damned. Just keep the P.O.O. on their toes!
So here is a plea to our Tamil-Canadian protesters. Please stay in Ottawa and switch the focus of your protests to include all things banned by Mother Dalton the Compassionate. I'll join you and march with pride (and alacrity), on the pesticide-free and grub-laden lawn of Parliament Hill.
20 April 2009
I'd Walk a Mile for a Tamil (4)
So if you were a Tamil Canadian, impressing the hell out of your fellow citizens by blocking traffic in the nation's capital (the other capital, not the Quebec one), how would you welcome "your" Prime Minister home? Maybe you'd try increasing the number of protesters by a huge amount to make Ottawans even less sympathetic to your cause?
Well, kids, it looks like they'll be doing just that tomorrow. As the CTV website reports, "Organizers are predicting as many as 25,000 people in their ranks on Tuesday to coincide with Prime Minister Stephen Harper's return from the Summit of the Americas..."
This editorial hits the nail on the head.
For those bleeding hearts who are whinging that there are more important issues at stake than traffic - think again. The issue here is that whilst there may indeed be some residual sympathy for the oppressed Tamil population in Sri Lanka, their fellow (now Canadian) Tamils do them no favours by parading on Parliament Hill bearing the flags of a terrorist organization (the Tamil Tigers), and spilling out onto our roads to bring our city to a standstill. It is indeed an insult to the country that has welcomed these protesters and helped them establish lives in a safe and pseudo-democratic nation.
So to all you protesters (and their NDP supporters), stop the hunger strikes, get rid of the LTTE flags alongside MY Canadian flag, and then maybe we normal selfish Ottawans will pay your cause a little more respect.
Go Bruins!
Well, kids, it looks like they'll be doing just that tomorrow. As the CTV website reports, "Organizers are predicting as many as 25,000 people in their ranks on Tuesday to coincide with Prime Minister Stephen Harper's return from the Summit of the Americas..."
This editorial hits the nail on the head.
For those bleeding hearts who are whinging that there are more important issues at stake than traffic - think again. The issue here is that whilst there may indeed be some residual sympathy for the oppressed Tamil population in Sri Lanka, their fellow (now Canadian) Tamils do them no favours by parading on Parliament Hill bearing the flags of a terrorist organization (the Tamil Tigers), and spilling out onto our roads to bring our city to a standstill. It is indeed an insult to the country that has welcomed these protesters and helped them establish lives in a safe and pseudo-democratic nation.
So to all you protesters (and their NDP supporters), stop the hunger strikes, get rid of the LTTE flags alongside MY Canadian flag, and then maybe we normal selfish Ottawans will pay your cause a little more respect.
Go Bruins!
14 April 2009
Easter SEALS to the Rescue
Hallelujah lawdy lawdy lawdy and Hallelujah again!
The US Navy has sent three Somali pirates packing in a decisive (let's hope not isolated) victory for the forces of goodness and niceness over evilness and badness.
Obama finally authorized something that makes sense, and needed doing at a time when the rest of the civilized world (except France - God bless 'em) has pretty much let these pirates run amok in the waters off East Africa. Yes I know, NATO and other countries have ships patrolling, but it does a redneck's heart proud to see some of these criminals taken out but fer good.
And despite their bluster and threats that Americans will be in ever more danger, these brigands will probably think twice before they stop a US-registered ship to check out the merchandise.
The US Navy has sent three Somali pirates packing in a decisive (let's hope not isolated) victory for the forces of goodness and niceness over evilness and badness.
Obama finally authorized something that makes sense, and needed doing at a time when the rest of the civilized world (except France - God bless 'em) has pretty much let these pirates run amok in the waters off East Africa. Yes I know, NATO and other countries have ships patrolling, but it does a redneck's heart proud to see some of these criminals taken out but fer good.
And despite their bluster and threats that Americans will be in ever more danger, these brigands will probably think twice before they stop a US-registered ship to check out the merchandise.
To paraphrase a famous Monty Python sketch (inserted words in italics - my apologies to the parrot):
“This pirate is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the plank 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PIRATE!!”
Good news for the ex-pirates is that Marilyn Chambers has just kicked it as well, so when they all arrive at the Pearly Gates, or the Green Door, whichever the case, maybe she can take their minds off their failed venture? I'm just sayin'...
Anyway, well done US Navy and well done the boat's crew!
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